http://www.emanator.demon.co.uk/bigclive/usbshit.htm

I didn't bother reading the whole thing so I don't know what it is for.

I noticed a lot of hits coming from this site: http://www.nexopia.com/profile.php?uid=65635

Wow... someone actually stole one of my custom chicken icons! Megan apparently likes chicken, "puckbunny", and is a PIMP. And, she likes my Golden Chick icon from last December.

Last week found us in Tucson.

Tucson, Arizona. Yessirree.

Tucson has lots of tourist attractions. There's the Old Tucson movies studios.  The Titan Missle Museum. Malls aplenty. We opted for an afternoon at Casino Del Sol. When I used to visit my grandmother in Tucson, there weren't any casinos nearby, but now they are big business. Casino Del Sol  is very beautiful - very out of place seems this beautiful large building in such humble surroundings.

Let me just say that it has been a fair number of years since I have been to Vegas, and that David had never been in a Casino. We opted for the slots, as do 95% of Casino visitors (and to think that I always felt like a spacktard for taking the easy, no eye-contact way out of gambling).

We hung around, trying to look knowledgeable, in the nickel slot section of the casino. David actually asked a cashier with a rolly cart for some advice on how to use the slots. I think he tipped her because she started to hang out and give me advice too. I pondered tipping her a nickel but it seemed too stupid so I didn't.

One thing I noticed is that slots have gone interactive. They are actually branded. The first one I played had a Green Acres theme and required some touch screen tickling of some rodent characters. Then, I found Lucky Larry's Lobstermania, which played incredibly brief little song snippets of the B-52's Rock Lobster. And, I do mean brief: Dnd drnd drnd drnd drnd drd drnd. I kept dropping more nickles in just to see how few notes it took to recognize the damned song.

Another thing I noticed is that modern slot machines have a better sound system than my car, and quite possibly, than our house. They didn't even have the option of the pull-handle on the side, like the last time I was in Vegas.

One thing missing: the ching ching ching of winnings falling into the coin tray.

Another thing missing: Grandma. Why we were in Tucson in the first place. Rest in Peace.

A number of years ago, I went to lunch at a Round Table pizza restaurant in Paramount, California. As I sat there eating my salad in the middle of the busy lunch rush, I saw a fully grown brown rat scale the wall and climb up onto a shelf. He disappeared behind some miscellaneous bric-a-brac. I pointed the vermin out to a passing waitress while stifling a shreik. She told me, "Shhhhh".

That was not the first brush with the whole rats and pizza ball of wax, however. That dubious honor goes to Chuck E. Cheese's. If ever there was an establishment that would benefit from a nightly steam cleaning (a la French public toilet), it is this place. There are kids everywhere, picking noses, sneezing, whizzing, spreading cheese, tomato sauce and Alpo on every reachable surface, and the last thing I want to think about is the bathrooms.

One thing that almost every adult who has been to a Chuck E. Cheese points out is that they serve beer and wine. I think that is why they are still in business.

If you are in the mood to laugh, read the RetroCrush archive about Chuck E. Cheese. If you have some spare pants handy, go ahead and read Silver's first hand account of working at a Chuck E. Cheese.  You'll find it about 80% of the way down the page.

Just so you know, I can look up how people have come to find my blog.  Blogware lets me look at "referers". I can see what search engine was used, and what search terms were entered to lead a person to Brennerworld.

Most of my hits come from people searching for "chicken icon".  That is interesting, as I don't know why there are so many people searching for chicken icons. Any of you people searching for "chicken icon" please share! What do you do when you find them?  But, if they want chicken icons, I've got them. One of these days I am going to get a picture of David doing his impression of Golden Chick for you. Priceless. Also, our local Boston Market had a delivery van with a chicken on it for a while, but it is now gone! They must have gotten word that I have a low-res suburban camera phone now.

As far as searches resulting in someone finding my blog, I like this one best: using a search engine called Devilfinder.com, someone entered the term "yucky". And, they found Brennerworld.  Awesome!

The one I liked the least: someone searching for me, specifically, by name. That gives me the heebee jeebees. Go away, you weirdo!

This gem was listed on eBay in August 2001.

If I'm not mistaken, there are a couple of rabbits' feet hanging off of the horn on the right, and for some reason, this thing is on casters. I'm thinking all one would need is a good tile or concrete floor and an unsuspecting cat for an evening of good clean fun. Perhaps you could take it to the local skate park.

I used to frequent a great site full of this sort of thing, and while I don't drop in there too often these days, I do like to periodically visit Ram's Head Snuff Mill and Gator Bride for old times' sake. Some of the descriptions are hilarious and I think you simply must take a look immediately, if not sooner.

Call me cheap, or old fashioned, but I just don't see the point of all these new disposable products.

I went along with the Swiffer duster for a while. I even had a dedicated car Swiffer.

I have, somewhere, some orange flavored Pledge furniture wipes in a little pop-up package. Mmmm!

I have scads of Clorox wipes in the pop-up canister.

What irks me though, are all those new disposable toilet brushes. Why does this bother me?

Well, for one, unless you throw the entire thing away, handle and all, every time you use it, you are going to be storing bacteria and other "whatnot" on the part of the contraption that gets reused.  At least I would because I scrub very enthisiastically below the low tide mark.

And then you have that Lysol Ready Brush which is a tradional, non-disposable toilet brush with a gimmicky spray can inside. What is the point of that? It's as though the Lysol people succumbed to peer pressure so that they could have something to put next to the Clorox ToiletWand and the Scrubbing Bubbles Fresh Brush.  Also, men will like the Lysol Ready Brush because it works kind of like a gun, and men like guns. In fact, their TV ad shows a typical TV dad-type man lying to his wife about his chores.

Who comes up with these names, anyway?  Fresh Brush sounds like a free sample from the dentist. Comet Clean and Flush (now there's a concept). Lysol Ready Brush, ready for emergencies. A good name might also be the Lysol Intrepid Brush or the Lysol USS Enterprise for men.

Basically, I think these companies are capitalizing on the two income household. Workin' wimmin folk are thinking, "I'm working in the factory all day, I should have all these conveniences to help the few hours I have at home that much easier. So what if they really don't work. I'm worth it!"

Come to think of it, you see a lot of men in the commercials for these products. So, perhaps, men are designing these things because, you know, men like to invent things, whether we need them or not. Like battery operated whirly brushes: for toilets, for dishes (don't get me started), shaped like mermaids and race cars for the kids' teeth, and even for the laundry.

I'll bet you would never see any self-respecting maid using this junk.

I keep finding myself coming back to the basics: a clean damp terry cloth towel and maybe a sprinkle of cleanser.

Oh yeah - and my Black and Decker ScumBuster Plus.

...why my car smelled like doughnuts today when I went to the gym.

That isn't a good thing!

Does everyone here already know that Avlimil is brought to you by the makers of Enzyte?

I really didn't think so.

Anyway, you know smilin' Bob takes the Enzyte, and then the ladies in the club house, the Japanese waitress, man, everyone is checking out Bob, Bob's package, Bob's big shoes.

Whoa! Bob's swimsuit came off!

Avlimil is made by these same people. But Avlimil is dignified, for the poor ladies who have to work, clean the house, take the dog for a walk, yadda yadda.  After all that, weak women-folk are just not frisky. Ask any weak woman, and she will tell you.

The commercial shows one woman, presumably after taking Avlimil, jumping up and down on the bed.  The man, petrified or foolish, sits there smiling.

I'm married, and I don't think that jumping up and down on the bed really means "I'm in the mood".

And, the company marketing this crap is Berkeley Nutraceuticals.  What the heck is a nutraceutical anyway?

I think nutraceutical = hooey.

How stupid.

Please credit my account.